Why do bad things always happen around the holidays, aren't they supposed to be good and special? Every year somehow it always gets ruined. This year looks just the same. My dad will either be out of the picture, or in it destroying it.

He's up in Warren right now in the hospital. Mom committed him again, he was talking extra crazy so his parents talked to my mom and the decision was made to do it again. This time for a longer time and they'll very possibly 303 him. Which means they'll keep him longer. There's even been talk that he may have to go to Warren State Hospital.

He cried to me before I left the house to go to my grams. Something was odd, more odd than usual. Mom told me she thought he was gonna kill himself that day. Either way he ended up in the hospital. There's nothing physically wrong with him, but mentally...

I can't even begin to describe how bad it is now. I cried so hard when I had to hug him goodbye in the hospital. He had to go back to his room early because he was acting up (pointing fingers and grabbing my mom) so he left again....I haven't seen him since then. The only thing I remember thinking while hugging him, is "why?" Life is taking my dad far away from me, so far he may never come back. You don't even know how bad this is.

He really believes the conspiracy in his head is real. He believes that the neighbors are all watching him and plotting against him and everyone around him "knows"

My daddy is a good person, to see this happen breaks my heart into so many pieces it'll never go back together right. I've given up on ever having my dad hold me and rub my back in the recliner while I fall asleep in his lap and arms. I'll probably never win or lose another game of checkers with him. I'll probably never be able to happily and willingly go grocery shopping with him. I guess I lost my dad again, this time it looks like it's for good.

Not many people come out of this state of mind. He really believes all this, he believes it with every last fiber of his being. I think he's schitzophrenic personally. But I don't know, I guess we'll find out sooner or later. Life just likes to fuck me over again and again.

God I'm pissed. I'm doing really good in all my classes except for World Studies I , it's just the same shit as in World Studies II >=(  but the answers are harder to find, ftw.

So my mom usually does those for me.

I got an incomplete on my reportcard for that class because I failed the last submission I had to do, I tried redoing it like 4 times. Still no luck. SO

I email the teacher and asked what questions I got wrong. YOU KNOW WHAT HE FUCKING SAID TO ME?

SORRY I DON'T GIVE THAT INFORMATION OUT, JUST LOOK OVER ANY OF THE ONES YOU WEREN'T SURE OF!!

Okay dick head, I'm not sure of ANY of them. And yanno what else,  SCREW YOU ALL OFF DICK HEAD I HOPE YOU BURN IN AN ETERNAL INFERNO D<

But other than that my grades are the best they've been in 3 years.

I fuckin hate people.

Aside from that my cousin is back in the hospital, his white blood cell count is .1 D= , not good at all. I'm so worried. God I hope he makes it through this. Things aren't looking good at all, be strong Aiden!

It's finally snowing outside. It's pretty.

I have my AC on though, it's really hot upstairs for some reason.

I made some artsy fartsy shit, I'll put it under a cut, check it out...

Man I dneno. I need to do something interesting.

<3 Mark

First off, my cousin has a carepage on some website, if any of you would like to see just drop a comment and I'll instruct you there

It's updates are probably more in depth than anything I'll give but here's what I can provide from the page.



So anyway, life has been the same. My UTI is still there but I now have some good ol medication. Yay me, should be gone here soon.

I'm blowing off all of my work for classes right now, they're boring and I wanna do something more fun.
I went to customize my lj moods n it died n didn't save so I have to upload like a bagillion more things again, trying to get cute Dethklok moods XD



Dethklok obsession still running it's course. Obviously.

I went to see Aiden today, he's doing very well  good to see. He might be able to come home today. That is until his next treatment of chemo, then it's back to Buffalo.

Now. Marky.

I was talking to my mom in the car about crappy names and I said I didn't like mine. She said she wanted to name me Marky Renae but my dad would have none of it.
Nobody I've brought it up to likes it, but you know what screw them. I like it. So my mom asked me if I'd rather be called Marky, n I said yes. This doesn't mean I'm getting a legal name change but I get to be Marky.

Although I would like to talk to them about really getting it changed. I like Marky Renae better. It's cuter and not common. That and my dad picks poopy names.